The Fear of Happiness

The Origin of Guilt:
What do you want out of life?...

Many of us already know what we want, what we expect, how we want life to be. But how many people truly believe they can achieve it? Often times, I believe the saying "it's too good to be true" is used out of context.

As human beings, we may have a subconscious feeling of guilt. We feel so undeserving of good things because....well, we don't deserve it. We are all born with a sinful nature. The guilt is somewhat a normal feeling. That's the whole point of getting saved, right? To erase that guilt. Give it to God and enjoy His unconditional love. So because of that, it's okay to want or expect good things out of life.

The Bliss:
Through the guilt, through the mess, through the confusion, through the nights of crying out to God for something better....it comes. The thing or person you been waiting for, praying for...comes. Isn't it the most beautiful scariest feeling in the world? Your thoughts are filled with this person every idle moment, your imagination evolves, and you wonder... can it be true? You wonder how you deserve such a blessing, despite the pain you endured and the things you done in the past you may not be proud of. You have a piece of...Happiness. Finally. You have a sense of peace. Its a crazy, unbelievable feeling you thought you would never feel... It's bliss...

The Familiar:
Then, human nature kicks in. That bliss quickly turns into suspicion. That bliss turns into doubt. That bliss turns right back to guilt... I wonder why? Too many times I see people ruin a good thing because of that. Some call it paranoia, some call it foolishness. Personally...it's both. But let's call it what it really is...Fear. The Fear of Happiness...

Fear causes many things. Fear causes many lives to operate in a circle. It's repetitive. It's predictable. The same cycle of jobs, relationships, friends...all in the same cycle. Ignorance is not to blame, because we know better. The only ones that achieve true happiness, are the ones that's brave enough to break the cycle and explore the unexplored. Logically, it would make perfect sense to break the never-ending, unhappy cycle, but most of us don't think logically. People in general will choose Emotions over Logic every time. I call it "playing it safe", but in actuality its not really "safe" at all. It's just predictable. It's familiar, we know what to expect whether it's good or bad. Its like reading a good book and you're comfortable already knowing how it ends. That's one of the reasons why people get back into unhealthy situations. It's predictable.

The Fear:
To be such a "bold" generation, most of us are really cowardly. We're scared. We're scared of the unknown. We're scared to live...LIFE. We're scared of a challenge. We're scared to fight for what we really want. Where's the ambition? Where's the drive? Where is our PRIDE? To get what we really want and accept it all in its abundance?

Many people get married, lead successful careers, live and die, never knowing the fullness of Happiness. People expect things to be given. We ask for things we're not able to handle. We expect things to be given. But true happiness is fought for....

Maturity trumps Ignorance every time.